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DANGARD - I finally have time to update all of this stuff!

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Colorado Springs, Colorado
181 lbs - 190 lbs
5'11 - 6'
Under 25k
Here For Dating
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People say that I am:  
I have enough personality to keep an entire panel of shrinks busy :) I'm definitely a people person, I can find good qualities in almost anyone. I like being the guy that makes everyone else enjoy themselves, whether it's through comedy, karaoke, storytelling, or even playing therapist.
Things that have bothered me:  
The usual result is-"You're different from the other guys i've dated. I like you as a friend". Translation-"I'm gonna go screw every other guy in town, and then call you and whine about how I never meet any nice guys". Hello? I'm right here!
I am looking for:  
Cute, smart, funny,full of personality, and a heart of gold. If you're all of the above, you'll have me at "hello". I really have a weakness for Russian women too, so in that case you'll probably have me at zdravstvootye!
My funniest life experience:  
I'm gonna break the rules and list a few- I superglued a football to my thumb in high school while trying to fix the little rubber piece the air goes in. I went bowling dressed as the grim reaper on Halloween weekend. an example of my one-liners: "Dan, do you ever cuss?" "F %# no!" (censored here just to be safe) Here's a new one to add that happened at work over the summer in -one of the teenage girls at work got frustrated with another guy there and wound saying to him, "GOD, why do you build me up??!!" I immediately broke the tension by replying with, "Buttercup baby, just to let me down.", in an almost Leslie Nielsen trying to be serious tone. Another employee chimed in with, "and mess me around, and then worst of all", followed by another employee joining in with, "you never call baby when you say you will". By the time it was all done, the entire crew had gone through a spoken word rendition of a whole verse of the song! I've never seen anything like that in my life, it was great!
Cool Movies:  
Terminator 2: Judgment Day, my favorite movie ever. Next on the list would be Dogma, Fear & Loathing In Las Vegas, the American Pie series, and the original version of The out Of Towners,with Jack Lemmon & Sandy Dennis in it. Beyond that, I like cute and funny movies, pretty much anything with Sandra Bullock, or Meg Ryan. O.K., I guess you could say I like the ones guys call "chick flicks"; I actually enjoy watching movies that leaved you going "aww!" when the happy ending comes along. When do I get my happy ending? A new one I have to add is Martin Scorcese's "The Departed", it had an all around awesome cast, great storyline, seing Jack Nicholson playing a godfather type role was priceless!
My Favorite Groups are:  
Tori Amos,Amorphis,Fiona Apple,Argyle Park,Ascension of the Watchers,Audioslave,Beatallica,The Black Crowes,Andreas Bocelli,Sarah Brig an,Paul Carrack,Johnny Cash,Richard Cheese,Coldplay,Phil Collins,Cornbread Red,Chris Cornell,Crowbar,The Cure,John Denver,Neil Diamond,Celine Dion,Dimmu Borgir,Duran Duran,Eminem,Emperor,Enya,Fear Factory,David Gilmour,Josh Groban,Hootie & The Blowfish,Ice-T,Ice Cube,Insane Clown Posse,Iron Horse,Chris Isaak,Jewel,Billy Joel,Norah Jones,Journey,Katatonia, King Diamond,Neil Diamond,Diana Krall,Jonny Lang,Matchbox 20,Marilyn Manson,Me First & The Gimme Gimmes,Michael McDonald,Mike & The Mechanics,Sarah McLachlan,Mercyful Fate,Metallica,My Dying Bride,Pantera,Paradise Lost,Pink Floyd,Henry Rollins,William Shatner,Simon & Garfunkel,Slayer,Soundgarden,Sting,Suicidal Tendencies,Tiamat,Train,U2,Wierd Al Yankovic,Yanni
I am looking for a personality like:  
Seeing them be themselves, maybe even seeing them doing something out of the ordinary. Be spontaneous, I won't get scared off! I'm such a goofball myself that I think it encourages everyone and anyone around me to just be themselves. For instance, I love going karaokeing and leaving people guessing what i'll do next. I've got the vocal range to just auto-pilot through tough songs like Bohemian Rhapsody, but I like turning Walking On Sunshine into sort of a ska song.
Are you willing to compromise in difficult times and situations?  
I like seeing other people happy, so compromising wouldn't be difficult at all, I just can't think of any specific examples. I like watching romantic comedies, how much compromise could I possibly require? It's not difficult to switch me from Slayer to Celine Dion either.
Willingness to meet others from boM:  
I haven't met anyone online yet, but i've struck out everywhere else, so here I am, and i'm gonna give it a try.
Are you ready to start from scratch?  
I think it would help to have somebody to give me a push now that I have things lining up for my book. I'd like to eventually line up one week where I do an appearance at a college, a book signing, and a featured reader spot, all in the same week.
My typical day:  
I'd love to have somebody that'll go along with me to a poetry reading. I'm trying to get more Fridays off so I can go out & help build the audience for the book I wrote. I can't really go into it here, I get alot of my funniest material from dating sites. I guess for me a perfect date would be to start at a buffet, go to a poetry reading, and then karaoke afterwards.
My Wish List Includes:  
I'd love to try out for American Idol, but i'm years past their age limit. I'd love to get up enough guts to just pack up, run off to California, and try acting, I think i'd do well on MadTV. I've learned the voices of John Madden, James Hetfield (Metallica's singer),and every president from Reagan to Dubya. I'd like to try tornado chasing sometime, but i'm too afraid i'd get too close and get killed, i'm a weather geek too. I know the weather well enough that i'm scared i'd put us right where the actions gonna be and we'd have to flee the scene immediately. Since I can't do Idol i'd love to just form a band, and it would be pretty unique too with my diverse taste. Imagine Evanescence with Josh Groban singing.
My Videos/Music/Other Content:  
This has to be the funniest video i've seen this year:

I'm not Materialistic.
I Smoke Sometimes.
I Drink Sometimes.
I Like Pets.
Sometimes I like to travel.
I am Not an Active Person.
I Don't spend long hours at Work.
I Am a Spontaneous Person.
Friends Are Important to me.
I Like Competitive Partners.
Sometimes I like clubs/bars.
My life is somewhat stressfull.
I sometimes try to stay in shape.
I sometimes want to get married.
Sometimes I feel that I would like to have kids.
Sometimes I can be stubborn.
Sometimes I enjoy going to the movies.
Sometimes Sex is important to me.
I like a Clean Place.
God is sometimes important to me in relationships.
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